I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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