Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
