she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
