? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
