with your own penis?
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
