Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize