I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Randomize