She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
So vagazzling was a success
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
