I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize