Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize