Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize