Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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