...so i touched it.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
