People with herpes should wear stickers.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize