you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Randomize
