Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize