Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
