Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
