Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Randomize