call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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