You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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