I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
