It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
