When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
