My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Someone shattered a urinal.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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