He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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