My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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