I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
