I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
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