No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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