I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
