Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
