I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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