What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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