I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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