He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
