i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
