I seem to have left my pride at pride
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
