Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
