Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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