I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
