If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize