Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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