I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
