love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
