the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
We left the knife in your bed.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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