Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
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