If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
