dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
