you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Randomize
