the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
