Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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